6 November 2011

Growing Up to Grown Up

I recently had a pedicure and lunch with a good friend of mine.  We've been friends for years and years, through boyfriend issues, falling out of other friendships, career changes, and basicially everything that life can throw at two thirtysomething girls in a ten year period.  It was probably one of the most fun Sundays I have had in a while - what's more fun than treating yourself with a pedi and catching up with a good friend?

As we were catching up we started talking about another friend who had married a few years back and recently had a baby.  I haven't seen her in about 5 years, however she still keeps in touch with my friend.  I learned that even after having a child, she hadn't changed much.  She lives with her in laws (rent free it seems), she is on mat leave yet leaves her kid with her mother in law all the time, her husband doesn't work because he's claiming he has a genetic foot issue (?), and the two of them had just come back from their 2nd vacation in the last 6 months.  Basically, she isn't any more of an adult than when I saw her last which, when you think about it, is kind of sad.  When did growing up and talking responsibility for your life and your choices go by the wayside for my (our) generation?

I suppose it isn't up for me to judge, but perhaps it is all in how you are raised.  For me, growing up was really tough and I couldn't get to adulthood fast enough.  But for others, childhood was being doted on or protected by a parent or parents and to transition to the adult world of being completely responsibile for yourself and your choices from that perspective is really hard.  Maybe for some, it is just never one of those things that you get used to and as long as you are lucky enough to have parents or in laws who support you, both emotionally and financially, you don't ever really need to grow up in some ways.

In any case, I'm just glad that I've been responsible for my choices and made the mistakes I needed to make to get to where I am now.  I don't 100% feel like a woman...that is such big word for me that carries so much meaning.  But, in the same sense, I'm not a girl anymore.  I've got my shit together enough to know that there is no going back to being a kid, and for me, that's a great thing.

Also, if the little girl from the Cosby Show that I used to watch when I was a kid is an adult now, it's about time I grew up too...

Remeber cute little Olivia from the Cosby Show?  Yeah, she's  26 now...

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